$Million
Dollar
Cock

Coming Soon. Premature Subscribers Welcome.

The most expensive cock on the internet. It's a rooster. Obviously.

1,000,000 pixels. $1 each.
They form a giant golden rooster.
Your face goes on it. Forever.
This is the future of finance.

Revenue Goal

$0 / $1,000,000

Investment Opportunities*

The Pecker

$100

100 pixels. Enough to fit a tiny, humiliating version of your face on the cock.

The Big Cock Energy

$1,000

1,000 pixels. Now we're talking. Visible from across the room. Your parents might notice.

The Whole Breast

$10,000

10,000 pixels. 1% of the cock. Add "cock owner" to your business card.

*Not actual investments. You are buying pixels on a picture of a chicken. Please do not call the SEC.

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Is this a scam?

No. You give us money. We put your picture on a cock. Transaction complete. That's just commerce.

Why is it called Million Dollar Cock?

Because "Million Dollar Rooster" didn't have the same ring to it, and the domain was available. Shockingly.

Is this an NFT?

Absolutely not. This is worse. At least NFTs pretend to have utility. You're literally buying pixels on a chicken. But it's OUR chicken.

What happens when all pixels are sold?

We retire. The cock lives forever. Historians will write about this. Probably.

Can I write this off on my taxes?

We are not tax advisors, but we believe in you. "Advertising expense" sounds right. Don't quote us. Actually, quote us. Free press.

What if I want a refund?

LOL. But also no. All cock sales are final.